Giving You Random Thoughts and Cash

This is going to be like Deep Thoughts by Jack Handey.  Except they will be shallow thoughts, read silently to yourself, and without easy-listening music.  Well you could play whatever music you want, but you’ll have to provide that yourself because my budget doesn’t allow for “background music” or “electricity” or “properly-fit undergarments.”  Feel free to read them out loud as well.  Try on some different accents if you are feeling particularly desperate to avoid housework creative.

Before I begin though I feel like we need to explore this whole Jack Handey thing some more.  Do you remember that from SNL?  Did you know that he is a real person and that is his actual name?  He is a humourist and was writer and co-producer of SNL.  I suppose when your parents give you a name like that, comedian or serial killer are really your only career options.

Random Thoughts by Tara Wilson

I forget every single one of them.  I should have typed the introduction last.  Stupid Jack Handey.

I can hear Nerdguy on a conference call and I am 99% sure that he works with Trace Adkins and Hannibal Lecter.

Each of my two best friends from high school sent me a Christmas card (just in case you weren’t completely clear on this one, I’m the disorganized one in this trio – they could put Martha Stewart to shame (if the U.S. Federal Court system hasn’t already done that)).  The cards arrived on separate days – but here’s the kicker – each of their cards arrived on the same day as one from their parents.  And I know that their parents mailed their own.  I found that to be a strange coincidence.  That I am now fixating on instead of writing my own cards.

Trace is very distracting with his booming voice.

Why when all 3 of my children get to school without snowpants, was it me who forgot them?

Whenever there is a new comment on my blog I get an email which prompts roughly 6 notifications to my phone.  This happens even when it is me replying to one of your comments.  I get very excited when I hear my phone ding and see that I got a comment, so I have to check as soon as I hear the ding.  Even though it was just me.  Every time.  It’s all very sad.  Possibly sadder than when I send myself test emails, just to make sure it’s still working.  Soon I’ll be sending myself flowers.  Or cat-lady starter kits.

I was reading a discussion on bad parenting tonight while yelling up the stairs “Go back to bed before I sell you both!”  If it was a how-to guide I was reading – NAILED IT!

My foot doctor shut her practice down.  Molly and I may not get over this.  I don’t let just anyone near my feet.  I may have to make my own orthotics out of shoe boxes now.  Hopefully it will go better than that last papier mâché project.

My final random thought of the day is that I wish I could win $325 U.S. right now to buy myself some new boots Christmas gifts for my loved ones.  Unfortunately I can’t.  But the good news is that you totally can!!  Make sure you enter the giveaway that I’m participating in with BLUNTmoms.

All of the details are in the giveaway post on my blog, but I will repost the rafflecopter thingamadoodle below to make it super-easy for you.  I’ll work on ordering those cats while you fill that out.  So work quickly so I don’t actually get the order placed please!

And when you get that done, BLUNTmoms is hosting another awesome giveaway that you’ll want to check out STAT!

a Rafflecopter giveaway


Comments

  1. says

    Your blog sound like my head! I can’t even keep things straight in my own mind, let alone out loud. Really I just wanted to post so that you’d get a ding. Here’s hoping it’s in your pocket, and on vibrate 😉 A little excitement just for you!

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