I was posting on facebook tonight about how lazy I have gotten this summer about bathing my children. If they have even made eye contact with a sprinkler, I consider them good to go! Or even if the law of averages applies…2 of them have either bathed or been swimming, or even just washed their hands with actual soap…I am giving the third kid a pass.
I was happy to learn that I am not alone in this summer hygiene hiatus. It seems that a dip in the lake, or even a future swim marked on the calendar count as Get Out of Bath Free cards.
So tonight, with one kid having already been swimming today, one in the sprinkler and another in a pool yesterday, and possibly all 3 heading to a pool tomorrow…why WOULD I give them a bath. That’s just environmentally irresponsible.
And then I fed them drippy, sticky watermelon. Outside. And egg salad sandwiches. And Maggie has insisted on wearing the same shirt for 4 days straight. And I am not entirely sure that she even got her hair wet in the pool.
So I caved and gave them all baths. Molly screamed bloody murder in the yard for 20 minutes because I think she thought hygiene was just a phase, like my cooking, and that we had moved past that nonsense. No one volunteered to be the first bather, until after awhile Grace said she would. At which point Molly shouted that she wanted to be first, and tried to tackle her on the deck. I’m surprised no one called the police. Or that she didn’t wake the raccoons.
So let that be your lesson. You have a garden hose for a reason. Don’t be afraid to use it. Refer to it as your “Outdoor Shower” and no one needs to know that instead of talking about this Pinterest worthy addition to your yard:
you are in fact talking about cleaning your children the same way that you would hose out the garbage cans, or scare off solicitors:
Besides, mosquitoes and wasps all like clean people. As for the flies…maybe throw a fly-swatter in your purse. The kids all want to hit each other anyway…may as well make it productive.