That’s Going To Take a Lot of Duct Tape

Nerdguy has a long list thing he does that drives me absolutely crazy.  He lines up his glasses and sunglasses on the narrow ledge above the mirror in the front hall.  The mirror sits above the dresser that we keep everyone’s hats and mittens in.  The drawers get slammed shut on a regular basis, causing his glasses (along with my last scrap of sanity) to fall off the ledge.  After that comes the inevitable exasperated growl out of me because I can’t figure out why he keeps putting them up there.  Maybe he finds my bear growl sexy.  Or in a similar fashion to those people who slowly poison their spouse over several months, so that they just assume they are getting ill, he is trying to slowly make me crazy.

Or there is the remote possibility that it has absolutely nothing to do with me.

That can’t be it.

Today he was heading out for a couple of appointments, and debating whether or not he would be back before it got dark.  He decided that he would be back in plenty of time, and would only take sunglasses.

A few minutes later he stormed back into the house, not in an angry fashion, but more like someone who was on a mission.  Walking across the front hall (on my freshly cleaned floor by the way) he matter-of-factly put his glasses down and declared “Found my glasses.  I ran them over.”  With that, he turned and left.  I had to investigate, and this is what I found:

Notice the completely busted frame on the left.  And he can’t even find a trace of the lens on the driveway.  He figures that he must have dropped them sometime after we went away for the weekend, and subsequently drove over them.  I’m just glad they were near his van, and not mine.

For some reason…I think it is the complete mental breakdown that is surely just around the corner, combined with improper cough medicine dosing…I dissolved into hysterical full-body laughter that nearly literally killed me what with the bronchial coughing and gasping for air.

I knew his improper glasses care would be the death of me one day.  And he accuses me of being dramatic…

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