Too Tired to Think of a Title

And now I think the time change has gotten me.  It’s 5:30 and I am wiped.  I think I tried to accomplish too much over the past 2 days.  That was my first mistake.  Doing things instead of watching TV and eating bonbons.  We’re lucky to have a TV.  I should be guarding it.  This is what happens when your priorities are all screwed up…you miss shows and you feel tired.  Let this be a warning to all of you so that you don’t make the same mistakes.

During the day I dumped my full glass of water into the garbage, and my candy organic granola bar wrappers into the sink.  I couldn’t think of the word “oars” and insisted on calling them “rowing sticks.”  And I couldn’t open my front door and had to get Nerdguy to do it for me.  But I am pretty sure that one was the door’s fault.

I’m also tired because I have been gathering and cleaning up a daycare worth of toys to donate to Maggie’s school.  We have been holding onto so many toys because she is kind of in 5 years worth of phases all at the same time.  She is still learning some of the play and communication skills of a toddler, and yet she enjoys Barbies like her soon-to-be 7 year old twin.  So our solution was to hoard all of the toys.  All of them.  Like Fisher Price was going to be the new currency when the world is ending, and a bucket full of Little People was going to buy our way into the last 5 spots in the underground pod.

Maggie’s idea of a good time is to dump all of the toys.  And clothes.  So that it just looks like the world has ended.  It took me the entire day on Saturday to clean up her floor.  Walking in her room was that wobbly-ankle walk that you see the people on Hoarders doing as they make their way along the rubble over stacks of magazines and lost cats.

Clearly some stuff had to go.

We could have had a garage sale next summer.  Except Oh My Gawd NO!  Or taken everything to Once Upon a Child and gotten (I caught myself typing gotten…thought I must really be tired if I am using such shoddy English…and then the more I stared at it, the more I couldn’t decide if it really is a word…so I have been off looking on Google…it seems I am safe if I live in New England, or am 300 hundred years old.  I don’t live in New England.) a little bit of cash.  But I kind of hate it there.  Dragging everything through a plaza parking lot to have my stuff judged, and then having to do the walk of shame to the car with it when it’s rejected.  It’s worse than a garage sale because I have to put on a bra and shoes.  Maybe we’re gaining some insight here as to why our prior garage sales haven’t gone so well.  Nah.

The IBI program that Maggie attends has very limited funding for toys, so they were very grateful for anything that we could give them.  It is a lot more motivating for the kids when there are new toys to work for as rewards, so we are really happy that we can provide that after all that the school has done for our family.

I’m sad to see the Little People things and the blocks go, but the enormous Dora kitchen, shopping cart, tea trolley, and washing machine…those things are lucky I didn’t pitch them off a cliff.  Extra housework required due to cleaning around model versions of domestic tools?  Seriously?  If they need practice doing laundry or cooking…I run a great apprenticeship program with a catchy name. It’s called Clean the Real Damn House.  
I have a patent lawyer on retainer.


  1. says

    Nope…”Once Upon a Child walk of shame back to car” was the howler for me. I LOVED THAT LINE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Oh my god, I was literally trembling with unleashed rage all day after my 2.5 hour/$12 pay out experience last month. Couldn’t have said it better.

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